http://justwoman.asiaone.com/Just%2BWoman/About%2BMe/Well%2BBeing/Story/A1Story20080917-88291.html
Marriage-the milestone for the countless dates we go through in relationships. It is easy to walk down the aisle, say the marriage vows and pledge to stay loyal to your partner and love and care for him/her no matter what the future holds for them. However, is it as easy to maintain, to keep the relationship going?
One important factor to keep the marriage going is of course, communication - both verbal and non-verbal.
In my opinion, the quality of verbal communication is more important than the quantity. Of course, the quantitative aspect should not be neglected too but more often than not, the hectic working schedule of the couple, assuming that both are employed, will reduce the time spend together and communication. Therefore, I feel that the time spent together should be maximized by improving the quality of communication and adopt an orientation of stimulus discrimination to show that you do care about the other party and you are special to him/her. In the long term, as the relationship grows stronger, dyadic consciousness will be developed and one would not see him or herself individually, but instead, as a couple.
Besides that, non-verbal plays an important role in sustaining a marriage. Kinesics, paralinguistics, oculesics, haptics and proxemixs can show your love and affection for the other party. Little gestures like a smile, winking at your partner, giving him/her a little peck on the cheek or even a little hug, does talk a lot on how much he/she means to you.
With the love and understanding of each other, as in the article, I believe that its possible for marriage to bind not only the two souls, but also the two families too. To love someone, I feel that one must accept his/her partner’s shortcomings, love his/her family. With the acceptance of the weaknesses and their family, frictions can then be minimized and relationship will be improved. While it may sound easy, to really to be able to do it, it really isn’t that easy. How much you love a person can determine to what extent you can accept their shortcomings.
Personally, I feel that marriage will certainly give me a sense of security being with my partner. Of course, that is not the only reason to get married. While some may feel that after marriage, they do not have as much freedom as before or will hinder their career pathway thus wanting to delay marriage, however, to me, marriage would allow me to spend more time with my partner alone and at this stage, the understanding of each other would reach another higher level. As much as I will like to have my own freedom, I desire to be able to spend as much time as possible with the one I love and that is one of the plus points of marriage! Don’t you think so too?
2 comments:
i agree totally that communication is an important factor to keep a relationship going, if not, marriage.
in many cases, spouses take it for granted once they have tied the knot; safely assuming they are safe from fear of being alone forever. and they abuse the partner by not maintaining care and concern via communication, unlike the courtship stage.
from the article about how marriage not only binds two souls but also two families, its absolutely true! in this age where we emphasise on personal rights and freedom, speech and individualism, we don't want to conform to traditions and cultures, even to expectations from parents(not to mention your mate's parents expectations). just thinking of how to appease e mother-in-law, answering difficult questions from the father-in-law, is pretty daunting.
and no wonder parents of this age are still complaining why their sons and daughters have not marry off, never realising the part of the problem lies with them.
The sanctity of marriage is failing these days in my opinion.As buzz argued,many people in marriage think the relationship in marriage will go uphill because they were involve in a "formal" ceremony to signify their love.
LOL.
If you need a formal ceremony to tell the world you are in love.....you ain't in love !I know many couples who have been with each other for YEARS and do not plan to get involve in the stupidity and drama of marriage.
Isn't that what matters?Love?
Or are people too concerned about letting the world know they ain't lonely and pathetic anymore?
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